Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Kate + 8, My New Wig & Football Weekend

I've been home for about 15 min and already soooo much to talk about!!

First and foremost, TLC announced "Jon & Kate + 8" will be renamed "Kate + 8" to reflect Kate's transition as a single mom of 8. Jon will still appear, but not so much.


But WAIT- Jon apparently has halted the divorce proceedings for 90 days in order for the family to work together more cooperatively through this transition AND admitted his less than stellar behavior since the separation, saying he got involved with other women too soon. Change of heart? Is this the end of his douche-baggery??? Doubtful. But acknowledgement is the first step. Sp please, Jon, we beg of you, please REALLY mean what you say and move forward in a more positive way for your children. They'll thank you later.

So, some of you may already know I ordered my Kate Gosselin halloween wig, for the SOLE PURPOSE of telling my husband I had a hair appt on my day off, so when he came home, I'd wear the wig and he'd FLIP out. Well, it came today. And the ONE DAY I worked late, he beat me home, saw the package, opened it and ruined my trick. So now I MUST wear it for halloween. I can't let my 12.99 go to waste. I will say, the quality of it sucks anyway, and I'm going to have to style it better...

And my trip to Ann Arbor was not so bad. Mich. won- barely. But whatever, we'll take it. The guy in front of us had his 6 year old with him and yelled at my brother-in-law for a little bit o' profanity. But hey- it's college football. You can't possibly bring your children and not expect it, so remember the earmuffs, folks. lol

Friday, September 25, 2009

Michigan Homecoming

Tomorrow, I am going to the UM homecoming game with the hubby, brother-in-law and others. I am posting this today, just to let everyone know how much I look forward to sleeping in on saturdays.

My BIL is insisting on being one of the first people to park on the golf course and tailgate. The game starts at noon.

We are leaving at 5am.

Last year when we went to a noon game, we left at 8am.

And still parked on the golf course.

And still tailgated.

So why this is necessary to leave at 5am; I am unsure.

I was told to "Take it or leave it."

So I will let everyone know how this goes. All I can say is, it better be a good game against Indiana. Go blue!!!!

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Having a day off is not always good...

So, I had my usual Wednesday off work, I sooo look forward to Wednesdays, and sleeping in, and a late shower, and taking time for a yummy breakfast. I normally don't have a lot planned, so I wind up cleaning, watching tv, surfin' the net, and keeping my 3 year old from injuring himself in a way that requires a trip to the ambulatory care center. If it only needs a band-aid, sweet.

At some point yesterday I decided that my home needs to look like a Pottery Barn catalog. This is difficult for 2 major reasons: 1. I have a 2 bedroom, just under 1000 sq ft home. It's hard to make it look like anything other than sardines in a can. 2. I had a day off. Hence, I cannot afford Pottery Barn. lol But I got a new catalog, and a new PB Kids catalog, so of COURSE, I spend my time scouring them cover to cover and making a wishlist. I also looked up some past holiday items on EBAY. And THAT'S when I started feeling crafty.

Have you ever seen the little chair-backers they make, or used to make? Yes, Kate had them on a Valentines episode of J&K+8, and I VOWED that if she can have cute things like that with 8 kids, surely I can manage with (soon to be) 2.

I do not sew.
I do not do anything that requires much thought, really.
I DO reallllly love it though when I make the cutest cookies in the class for preschool parties, or spend 10 hours on a Pablo- replica Backyardigans birthday cake and sigh modestly and smile when people say "You MADE that?!?". Or when people walk into our birthday parties and say "Wow."
And I DO really like it when I go above and beyond in ways other parents just don't see a point in doing, because MY kid had something theirs didn't. So sue me. (My mom-guilt, I'm sure will be discussed in a future posting.)

But I love it so much because I never felt like that as a child. My mom never went above & beyond, well, ANYTHING, to make me feel like I had or was something special. She was the one that on the class party sign up sheet, said to put her down for cups. I'm the mom that stands there analyzing what is the most possibly HARDEST, TIME-CONSUMING, and EXPENSIVE thing on the list. And that is what I sign up for.

But I digress.
I saw on ebay someone selling PBK chairbackers- spiders, for halloween, for $35 a piece. And my lightbulb went off and I was like "Phheeesssshhhh. I can make those for under $20." So when the hubby came home, I explained my idea and he gave me a blank look and said

"So you're telling me, there's going to be bags hanging off the chairs, filled with candy, all the time?"

"No. Focus. FOCUSSSSS. There will be a cute, HOLIDAY bag on the chair for a DAY. ONE DAY. WHATEVER HOLIDAY IT IS THAT I MAKE THE BAG FOR. To make our children happy. And it doesn't have to be candy. It can be a book or some dumb little toy. Whatever. Just don't worry about it, I'll show you when I'm done. And I can't AFFORD the Pottery Barn ones and I don't think it'll be hard to make them."

"Oh. You're so thrifty. And your boobs look HUGE today."


So I took my happy ass off to Hobby Lobby, excited I actually had something to...hobby. I got all my supplies, for $13, and texted my friend, who IS crafty (she even sewed her own diapers. that's dedication.) and quickly explained my idea and that I would be in need of some simple sewing skills. So we made plans for today.

Well, apparently, God did not want me making spider chair backers today, because her sewing machine broke and my demon child tried bringing her kids to the "other side". It ended in lots of tears, spankings, and yelling. And that's just what demon child did to ME. It ended when I came home, took all the toys from his room and found them new homes in other areas of the house (i.e. my dining room) and daddy came home and we all sat down and talked about being nice to each other and why we were all mad. And then read The Cat in the Hat.

As I looked at the new positions of the toy bins/box, I thought, my home looks sooooo much better when these toys are not in here for everyone to see. Way closer to Pottery Barn.

So, my chairbackers are still in pieces waiting to be sewn. I'll let you know how that goes.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Theme Tuesdays...animals in trouble!!! Ahhhhh!!!

Agh, in light of Jessica Simpson's little doggie being eaten by coyotes, The Gosselins giving back their dogs (apparently, this is temporarary people!) and the fact that I actually ENJOY singing the theme song from "The Wonder Pets", I have been thinking about my own little animal nugget...my cat, KitKat. One word, no hyphen. Just KitKat.

Poor little KitKat came to us as a rescued kitten off my husband's grandparents farm. He thought it was a cute litter of kittens, and the little yellow furball was his favorite. So he decided to save him from his fate of being sucked into a John Deere engine (which is what happens to most of the farm kittens...that or the VW Rabbit.) and bring him home for me. It was the first time in my life, I didn't have any pets, and I had always had a cat. And we weren't allowed to have pets wheer we lived, but we were bad asses so we did it anyway.

Grandpa told us KitKat was a girl. So I proceeded to go to the store and bought a pink collar, pink bowls, and a pink litter box. We later found out it was a boy; I'm pretty sure the day I took him to get fixed. Anyway, I spoiled the heck out of this cat. Gave it bathes, treats, brushed it, took it for check-ups at the vet.

And then the baby came.

My son was born and poor KitKat didn't know what him. He'd never seen the toe end of a shoe jabbing his ribs before...It wasn't that bad at first, but as time went on, KitKat got less and less attention, which leads us to today, where the poor cat reminds me to feed him by biting my calves.

Yesterday, kitty was in a rare mood where he was truly pissed about the cards he'd been dealt, and I could tell in his eyes he'd rather have taken the engine. My son will run up and kick him for no reason, he gets his tail pulled, pushed off furniture, stepped on...and I put the final nail in his little kitty coffin when I looked at him and said "Poor KitKat. Wait till there's 2 of them." And his eyes narrowed and he started growling at me. I tried to pet him, and he was sloooowly turning his head, which I knew meant to get my back-stabbing hand away before he ate it for dinner.

Oh yeah, I should go feed him...

*disclaimer: for PETA or the likeness: my cat is taken care of thank you, very much. Is it extravagant? No. But no one's life is with a toddler boy running around. So back off. He's old & grumpy. If I was him, and weighed 20 lbs and the only thing anyone ever said when they saw me was "What a big cat!" I'd be pissed too...as the toddler tries to pull my whiskers out...So I don't want to hear it.

Monday, September 21, 2009

The Emmys...Kate's new show...and Khloe getting married??

The Emmys...didn't watch. Nothin to say. But I have to mention it. lol I'm not big on award shows anymore, but I like to see what everyone wore splashed all over E! in the days following. Kristin Chenoworth looked great in silver sparkly number (note to self: join gym after baby is born...), Olivia Wilde was phenominol...and I can't remember what else I liked. :)

So the latest according to MSN, is Kate Gosselin MAY be a part of Paula Deen's show after all- but looks like we'll be waiting until Fall 2010. Sweet, because honestly, I don't think J&K+8 will go on past that. I love it, and I wish it would, but I don't see it. Anyway, tonights new episode was "Farm to Table" where they visited an organic farm, played family games. A good-old fashioned episode, which ended when Kate's custody ended. BUT- it did give me a chance to explain to my son that not all mommies & daddies live together, and all that garbage that you really don't want to talk to your kids about. Man, it's not even my life, so I can imagine how Kate felt REALLY explaining that to them. Well, no I can't actually. No one can unless they've done it.

So more drama in another of my fav. tv families...Khloe Kardashian getting married? Say WHAAA? lol IF this is true, I wish her and her new hubby the best and (white-elephant-in-the- room) hope it works out to a long and happy life together!

Due to my first comment posted (what a milestone), I DO feel the need to say, that this is not SOLELY a J&K blog...it's a mommy blog. Specifically, THIS mommy's blog. So THIS mommy says & feels what she wants, about whatever she wants. I have NOT staked this out with some neon sign that says "HATE ON JON G HERE --->", but I do feel he does this on his own. I do try to remain logical (as noted, I did NOT side with those saying Jon was an unfit father for taking the dogs away in front of the kids...ahem, just that he was an ass for it). Anyway, my purpose is not to attract anyone to BASH, my purpose is to LAUGH, and roll my eyes, and allow me to get my thoughts out on whatever, if for only 5 min. a day, because SOMETIMES that's all a mommy needs!

Friday, September 18, 2009

Jon's an A-Hole, Kate did G8, and I think the demons have left my childs body...whew!

Okay, I just commented on all of this on another blog but here we go: short and sweet: maybe...

1. Jon dramatically had the dogs carted off in front of the kids. Unfit to be a parent based on this event alone? No. Nominee for Father-of-the Year? No. But sleeping with the babysitter might get him thismuch closer to the title. Oh, snap....nope...no it won't. But keep trying Jon, the world is watching-and sadly loving- you making an arse out of your self at LEAST weekly. I'm sure Cara & Mady's little friends at school have seen the supermarket tabloids. Way to go Jerkoff.

2. Kate did awesome on the View. Whoopi acted like an idiot, constantly repeating the same stupid question over and over. Kate admitted she was wrong in going over there, did Whoopi NOT hear that? Get on with it. Geez.

3. My son has been a sweet little thing all day. However, we have yet to go uptown to the Canal Days Festival to pick up dinners, which is a mini-fair on Main Street here in America's Friendliest City, for those who do not know (and is the highlight if every Delphos resident each year). Mind you, there are rides, and games, and other things for me to waste valuable money on, so *here's to it being a positive experience for everyone involved*!!!

4. Oh- but my son did learn how to gag himself today and tried to make himself vomit at the sitter's when he didn't want to eat lunch. :) Just lovely.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Jordan won Big Brother, Biggest Loser starts, and this mom is losing her mind!!

Sorry it's been a couple days...not a whole lot to comment on. I was really happy Jordan won Big Brother, and not that little snake Natalie. Agh. Natalie was so annoying and stupid, she looked into the air at literally nothing every.time.she.talked. Just the sound of her voice annoyed me. She makes my skin crawl.

The Biggest Loser also started this week, another of my fav's. There's a lady whose husband, and 2 kids were killed in a car accident...horrible story. So I am pulling for her, and I'm sure most of America is.

And I am losing my mind because something horrific has inhabited my dear sweet son's body and taken control. And he's so sneaky about it, because when others are around i.e. my husband, he's just a happy little boy, no problems, no worries. As soon as we are alone, the monster comes out and immediately does something he knows he shouldn't, I tell him no or deal with whatever it is, and he begins ABUSING his poor, baby carrying, mother...and by abuse I mean, furiously slapping me in the face, and once even threw a hotwheels car in my face (apparently, the worst 98 cents I ever spent) and then telling me I am various things such as a poop-head, baby or stupid-head. I beg to differ. I have not had poop on my head since he was about 2 months old and had explosive diarrhea (true story), I'm obviously NOT a baby, I only MAKE them, and I cannot be a stupid-head, because stupid-heads do not graduate college.

Basically, all the precautions I have taken to NOT ruin my child's life thus far, have blown up in my face. I decided he needed a sibling, he seemingly does not, and I am questioning this decision myself at this point; I decided it would better for our family to take him from his daycare, to a babysitter, which he has been good for the sitter, he's told me he doesn't want new friends, he wants his old friends. He also does not understand that if he wants Christmas presents, he will go to the sitter, rather than daycare, lol. What have I done that is SO BAD??

I will keep you informed on how the exorcism goes. Because I'm pretty that's what needs done.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Kate on The View...Kanye makes an ass of himself...What a day...

So, I just watched todays' episode of The View, and Kate Gosselin looked AMAZING! She looked like she belonged there, and she has said in the past she'd like a talk show...future co-hosting gig?? Who knows, but she did good too. She gave up about as much personal info as I thought...about nothing! She says she will continue to take the high road...which is the best road to take Kate...someone's got to in this mess. But I LOVED when Sherry asked "What do you think about him bringing THAT GIRL around your kids???"

Onto Jackass-of-theYear, Kanye West. Agh what a douche. For anyone who hasn't heard, Taylor Swift beat Beyonce for video of the year at the VMA'S last night, and before Taylor could barely sueak out "This is amazing!", things quickly became un-amazing when Kanye jumped on stage and said he was happy for Taylor, but Beyonce made one of the best videos of all time, or some dumb shit. The camera went to Beyonce who totally had a look on her face which looked like she was thinking "I don't want this jack ass defending me...WTF??" BUT Beyonce, won later for something else (I don't even know, I didn't watch it, haven't since about 11th grade, but I saw the clip and heard the audio on the radio this morning) and told everyone she remembers what it was like being 17 and up for her first VMA award, and asked Taylor to come up and have her moment. How sweet. Kudos to Beyonce and Taylor, shame on you Kanye...good music (to some) will only get you so far. And for the record, I don't think Kanye is a musical genius like everyone else seems to think.

Oh update: apparently Kanye blogged he was sorry so it's all good then. Whatev.

Other than that, not too much else to comment on. There's the hermaphadite runner- poor girl. What a way to find that out. Apparently she is, or was, on suicide watch, so pray for that girl. How awful for something so personal to be told world wide before you even have time to digest the news. And a missing girl from Yale, her body was possibly found in a wall in a lab at Yale. How awful, pray for her family, and justice for their daughter/sister/friend.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Start the Jon & Kate discussion here!!

I am an dedicated Jon & Kate watcher, and a fan of Kate's...I DO think Jon has lost his damn mind, and I also think Kate had every reason to be demanding with Jon during their marriage- as evidenced by his recent behaviors.

The latest: Radar Online's pictures of Jon & Hailey kissing, and Jon told Kate he was bringing Hailey home to meet the kids, and Kate cried. I find it hysterical that at the end of last season, Jon did not want to be in the spotlight anymore, didn't want cameras around, just wanted a normal life...but how many times has he stood at his fence since then and talked to & made videos for the paparazzi?? And the kissing pictures- look totally staged, like they did it for the paparazzi. How disgusting. And his hissy fit he threw on his interview last week for abc? Agh. Lovely, Jon, just lovely. A divorce is hard enough on kids, let's make sure they know you despise their mother. Nothing like salt in a wound...

Just call me Ape...

Anyone that knows me, knows that I am outnumbered in my household. By my husband, my son, and even my cat. (Still don't know what baby #2 is...whether I'll have another player on my team or if I should forfeit the game...) and I say ALL. THE. TIME. that I totally picture myself as Ape; Bam Margera's mom. Ok, so maybe not that bad (Oh sweet Jesus, I pray not that bad...) But one day, I can guarantee, I'll be hiding in a corner while my son(s) and possibly even my husband attack me with pillows- and I am very sensitive about anyone touching my head, except for getting my hair done. Other than that, the head is off limits. But that's besides the point.

As a mom, I try really hard to allow my 3 year old to just be a 3 year old. I'm really relaxed about certain things. If no one's getting hurt, I pretty much won't have a problem with it. But sometimes this makes me look-and feel- pretty pitiful.

Case & point: I had a dr's appt this week, and had no other option but to bring my son, which I've never taken him there with me. It's just easier to go by myself. Anyway, I didn't have a sitter so I figured one time won't kill me, I'll just take him. He actually did well, but we had one minor mishap. So we're sitting there waiting for the Dr to come in and he says "Mama I have to go potty..." so we walk out the door, I stop at the nurses station to let them know where I'll be, in case the Dr came in, and take him into the bathroom. Now, my dear sweet little boy just got potty trained this summer and is just now getting into the standing up when he pees thing. Well, their toilet is about 2 inches higher than ours at home, and it had an elongated bowl which he refused to sit on. So he stands there, and the poor kid had no chance of making it into the bowl, since it was so tall, he proceeds to pee- straight into the corner of the room. In my horror, I yell "Point it down! Point it down!" and he says "What? I can't!" and swings it to the left, and pees across the toilet seat & lid and nails the other wall. At this point, there are puddles of pee on the floor and someone begins to knock. I don't even knwo what i said, just something to indicate that someone was in there, and he finishes peeing on the floor. Not a drop made in into the toilet.

So like I said, I'm pretty laid back, and I'm laughing as I grabbing fistfulls of papertowels to soak up the puddles and wipe the walls as fast as possible. I finish my "cleaning", get us both washed up and open the door to go out. Now there are 3 people in line.

I stop at the nurses station again where our nurse was standing, my Dr was sitting, and a few others. And this is what I said "Ummm this is really embarassing, but he just peed all over bathroom walls & floor, and I cleaned up what I could, but it's gonna need mopped and some disinfectant...and it smells." My Dr was the first one to crack up laughing (thats why I love her) and everyone else did too. And of course they were nice and said they'd take care of it. In the meantime, the next person in line had gone in, and I felt sorry for her, because it really did smell.

So, my funny thing today: I asked Austin what he wanted for lunch, and he says "Spagetti-Os but not hot ones, only cold ones." and I said "You want cold spagetti-o's?" and he nodded. And I looked at him like he had just asked if he could eat his own poop and I said "That's DISGUSTING." And then laughed at myself, for being so horrified at the thought of cold spagetti-o's, when clearly, there are worse things in the world. And that's when I decided to blog... :)

I finally did it!!

Well folks and fans, here it is: the long awaited BLOG. Many of you liked to read my ranting myspace blogs of a few years ago, that I've since deleted...ahem...and others have asked me to blog about anything from celebrity gossip, to waitressing for 5 years and the effect it has on my, um, social skills...whatever. It's probably going to be a compilation of many things that strike my interest...being a mom and the things that happen to me because of it (lol), celebrity gossip, my job cleaning teeth, and a few other hot topics right now: Jon & Kate + 8 and maybe even college football...

So feel free to comment, in fact, I insist on it, but please be respectful of others opinions. That's all I ask. I'll try to post one topic at a time, instead of one long post, for everyone to comment on...so let the blogging begin... :)